Still Stuck Trying To Convince Others Of Your Worth?
"Stop trying to convince prawns of your worth, when you are an orca.
Respect all life including the prawns, but know your place.
Charity could be an option, but collaboration or a career? Experience will teach you that one."
This idea was inspired by my time in the music industry and my music career as it continues to evolve. Again and again, I'll find myself inside bands which treat me as a side-piece because of my nature to love people, my kindness and them consciously or unconsciously taking advantage of me (their wishes which don't necessarily serve me). Of course, it's a 2-way street. I agreed to be inside all of these bands. No one forced me to.
I can't believe I'm typing this in the present tense. Some lessons take time it seems even for life coaches. We're all human after all and learning new things each day.
This lesson is applicable worldwide in any industry.
This is 2022. Apple Music featured an instrumental track of mine (read that again: no singing or vocals per se, other than looped samples), on their playlist New Music Daily. It stayed there for a week in April 2022, and peaked at number 22. And yet... I still find myself gravitating towards bands with beginners in them which keeps me at the same spot in my music career as far as live shows are concerned. This comes from a combination of reasons.
I probably have weak boundaries, which I'm working on strengthening daily. I probably am also doodling in my comfort zone, of being the smartest person in the room. While this feels comfortable, it offers no growth because to grow, you have to be stretched by people who are much more accomplished and en pointe than you. Lastly, it's probably because I'm empathetic to any new and young musicians who need help. A good trait by anyone's standards, but if it leads to the detriment of my career's growth and starts to affect me making a living for my young family, how good a trait is it, if we're being honest?
Tough choices between spending time hunting, and giving back to society and people a little more new to their career than you.
Maybe, this has to do with perhaps the Universe putting me there to mentor or lead. That's totally fine. If I get paid. Along with coaching, there should be payment. That's what we call BOUNDARIES, in the adult world. I actually did coach some musicians on how to be recording artists, and continue to slowly work on my YouTube channel Modern Recording Artist which helps musicians and anyone with a music talent or wish turn into a recording artist through proven, simple and effective steps. I was charging around S$3k per package then for about 3-4 months of coaching.
If I'm now agreeing to work with musicians at a stage of their career, whom I'm supposed to be mentoring (paid) instead of collaborating with, I have nobody to blame but myself if I get frustrated.
However, because of the loving nature of music, people and well... ME (I'm a softie), I can find myself in situations which don't do anything for my career, mental well-being or bank account, if I do not put my foot down.
A solid lesson for both myself, and many of my clients. Boundaries people! KNOW YOUR WORTH!!!
And um, get out of your comfort zone.
All My Love
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